• Est. 2015 in Grand Rapids, MI, USA
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Awkward Parking Lots, Deadly Duels, and the Antebellum Classics (Ad Navseam Ep. 160)

Meta Description: Join Dr. Jeff Winkle and Dr. David Noe in Ad Navseam Episode 160 as they explore antebellum America, classical oratory, and resources to master the Latin language.

Introduction: Tariffs, Aerosmith, and Cleopatra’s Carpet

Welcome back, classical gourmands, to Episode 160 of the Ad Navseam Podcast! Broadcasting directly from Vomitorium South—the basement of the RHB bookstore and coffee shop—your hosts, Dr. David Noe and Dr. Jeff Winkle, return to the microphones.

The episode begins with an exploration of their middle initials. Dave declares that his “C” stands for “catastrophic,” while Jeff decides his “T” stands for “tariffs,” joking that spending time with Dave always comes at a cost.

This leads to a discussion of the recurring awkwardness of their pre-show routines. Meeting in the parking lot, they step out of their vehicles while blasting vastly different music—Ben Folds for Jeff, and loud, thirteen-minute Whitesnake guitar instrumentals for Dave. To avoid this weekly standoff, the hosts joke about hiring an unpaid apprentice to construct separate bunker entrances, allowing them to bypass each other entirely. Jeff notes that Taylor Swift utilizes a tiny Airstream trailer to sneak into events unseen, prompting Dave to recall the classical legend of Cleopatra being rolled up in a carpet to be secretly delivered to Julius Caesar.

Corrigendum: The Waters of French Lick

Before diving into the primary academic text, the hosts address a geographical corrigendum submitted by frequent correspondent Will Fitzgerald. In a previous episode detailing the ancient healing sanctuaries of Asclepius, the hosts confessed their ignorance regarding any American equivalents. Fitzgerald writes in to correct the record, noting that “taking the waters” has a robust history in the United States. He lists several famous thermal destinations, including Saratoga Springs, Hot Springs, Palm Springs, and French Lick, Indiana. Dave is delighted to learn that French Lick—the hometown of basketball legend Larry Bird—boasted healing waters, joking that hydrotherapy might explain Bird’s on-court prowess. Fitzgerald also mentions the Battle Creek Sanitarium in Michigan, managed by John H. Kellogg, prompting a brief tangent about the gravel-like consistency of Grape-Nuts cereal.

Daniel Webster and the Deadly Inaugural

The core focus of Episode 160 resumes the podcast’s journey through Carl Richard’s 2009 book, The Golden Age of the Classics in America. Part three of this series examines the influence of Greece and Rome during the antebellum era, a period marked by expanding democratic suffrage and a rising middle class.

Richard highlights the famous orator Daniel Webster, who peppered his addresses to Congress and the Supreme Court with classical allusions. While defending Dartmouth College before the Supreme Court, Webster delivered a melodramatic flourish, comparing his alma mater to Julius Caesar surrounded by assassins in the Senate House and quoting the famous phrase et tu quoque mi fili. The hosts note the irony of Webster wrapping Caesar’s demise in a highly ornate, Ciceronian cloak.

While Webster utilized Latin phrases before the Supreme Court, he deliberately avoided them when appealing to lay juries. He also attempted to edit the speeches of others. In 1841, Webster persuaded President William Henry Harrison to delete a multitude of obscure classical references from his inaugural address, joking that he had successfully killed “seventeen Roman proconsuls as dead as smelt”. Despite these edits, Harrison delivered the lengthy address in the freezing rain and died a month later.

The Cherokee Iliad and Jackson’s Wallpaper

The spread of egalitarianism in the Western states opened political offices to men who possessed very little formal education. Richard shares an astonishing anecdote regarding Sam Houston, the future Texas governor. As a sixteen-year-old in Tennessee, Houston demanded that his local academy teach the ancient languages. When the teacher refused, Houston stormed out, declaring he would rather live with the wild liberty of the Cherokee Nation. Living among the Native Americans, Houston famously memorized all 500 pages of Alexander Pope’s translation of the Iliad, reciting the rhyming couplets to Cherokee girls during long walks to impress them.

Conversely, President Andrew Jackson exhibited a stark indifference to classical literature. Some politicians even praised Jackson’s ignorance of Greek and Latin, arguing that an over-reliance on ancient authority stifled original thought and sanded off the rough edges required for a man of action. However, Jackson still utilized neoclassical symbolism for political prestige. He hired Robert Mills to design his estate, the Hermitage, modeling its Corinthian columns on the Temple of the Winds in Athens. Jackson also adorned his walls with expensive French wallpaper depicting the goddess Minerva tossing Telemachus off a cliff, proving that classical aesthetics remained socially mandatory even for populist leaders.

Pericles and the Gettysburg Address

Richard draws a striking parallel between President Abraham Lincoln and the classical world. Quoting historian Garry Wills, Richard outlines the deep thematic connections between Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address and the Funeral Oration of Pericles from 429 BC.

Both speeches served to honor war dead and emphasize that heroic sacrifice provided a glory mere words could not augment. Both statesmen challenged the survivors to finish the crucial work of saving democracy, utilized dichotomies like mortality versus immortality, and invoked revered ancestors—the heroes of the Persian Wars for Pericles, and the patriots of the American Revolution for Lincoln. Furthermore, Lincoln followed Edward Everett’s exhaustive two-hour, classical-heavy oration with a concise, two-minute speech stripped of direct historical allusions. The hosts conclude that while Everett merely referred to Pericles, Lincoln managed to embody him.

A Deadly Linguistic Duel and Mid-Episode Sponsors

While Lincoln favored concise restraint, other politicians carried their classicism to absurd, violent lengths. John G. Palfrey complained that Virginia legislators would flaunt their erudition even when debating the mundane upholstery of the representative’s chamber. The stakes of this intellectual posturing were extremely high; Judge John Rowan famously killed Dr. James Chambers in a pistol duel over a dispute regarding which man possessed the more thorough knowledge of Greek and Latin. Rowan survived the duel and went on to serve in the U.S. Senate, safely insulated from any further imputations against his classical prowess.

Taking a brief pause from the historical bloodshed, the hosts extend their gratitude to the sponsors supporting the podcast.

The Rehabilitation of Athens and the Achaean League

Returning to the antebellum era, the hosts examine a massive shift in political philosophy. While the founding fathers admired the stability of the Roman Republic and feared the chaotic nature of democratic Athens, the rising antebellum generation began to embrace the Athenian model. British historians like Thomas Macaulay argued that the average Athenian citizen possessed far more political intelligence than the average English member of Parliament.

This shift influenced rhetorical tastes. Many Americans, following Thomas Jefferson, began to favor the direct, concise speeches of the Greek orator Demosthenes over the ornate, flowery speeches of the Roman statesman Cicero. John Quincy Adams summarized this aesthetic shift by declaring that Demosthenes represented the simple Doric pillar of democracy, while Cicero represented the florid Corinthian pillar of aristocracy.

Southern politicians also leveraged Greek history to defend states’ rights. During the Nullification Crisis, John C. Calhoun argued that the United States should emulate the Achaean League—a confederacy of decentralized Greek democracies that maintained local autonomy and united only for common defense. Jeff points out the special pleading inherent in this argument, noting that Southern politicians actively utilized classical precedent to justify and protect the institution of slavery.

The Alamo and the Monroe Doctrine

The final section of the chapter explores the American fascination with Sparta. Despite its totalitarian nature, Americans admired Spartan courage and patriotism. This reverence became explicit following the fall of the Alamo in 1836. Just 20 days after the garrison was overwhelmed, Texas citizens issued a resolution directly comparing Colonel William Travis and his doomed men to King Leonidas and the 300 Spartan volunteers who laid down their lives at Thermopylae.

This passionate philhellenism heavily influenced foreign policy. When Greek rebels fought for independence against the Ottoman Empire, the American public demanded intervention. Secretary of State John Quincy Adams was forced to walk a diplomatic tightrope. He published letters wishing the Greek rebels success to appease the voters, while quietly negotiating commercial treaties with the Turks to uphold the non-interventionist principles of the Monroe Doctrine.

Final Sponsors and the Gustatory Parting Shot

Realizing they are out of time, the hosts quickly wrap up the episode before closing out with their final sponsors.

To officially conclude Episode 160, the hosts extend their gratitude to Mishka the sound engineer and to the generous musicians Ken Tamplin and Scott Van Zen.

Dave then delivers the Gustatory Parting Shot, courtesy of the English poet and psychological horror writer, Walter de la Mare.

Regarding the relentless nature of consumption, de la Mare offers this poetic observation:

“Oh, pity the poor glutton whose troubles all begin, in struggling on and on to turn what’s out into what’s in.”

Check out the “Lurch with Merch” section on the website, beware of deadly linguistic duels, and keep taking in the classics. Valete!

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